woman-crying-breakupDid you wake up this morning with a devastating heart ache? Perhaps you’re experiencing a monumental “hangover” headache and you don’t even drink. Did you dread looking in the mirror, because you know what you’re going to look like? There is a very good chance you have if you have ever had a boyfriend break up.

Frankly there are many things in your relationship that could have brought forth the breakup. However, you and I are going to concentrate on just three of them today.

Cheating with another woman

Are you even sure you know what cheating is or what it actually involves? When you set down and began to examine the event that brought about the ending of the relationship, there are several question to ask yourself.

Was he texting a female you didn’t know about? If so was it someone at work and the text involved work. That could be a legitimate and perfectly innocent relationship and does not even qualify as cheating.

Does it mean he was having an ongoing sexual relationship with someone from his past? Yes! That definitely is out and out cheating on your relationship. Are you so jealous that when he even glances at another woman, you expect he is cheating on you?

love-affair-breakupAs you can see there are many definitions for cheating. Therefore you need to be perfectly clear in your mind what your definition is about cheating prior to breaking up with your boyfriend.

Now I’m going to throw a little curve at you from out of nowhere. Prior to starting your “steady” relationship, did you and he talk about what each of you expected in your romance?

You may be really surprised by his explanation when you do the boyfriend breakup thing, when he just looked at another woman or was texting someone at work. When this happens you may need to decide if your expectations were out of the so called norm. One thing about it though is when you really think about it you may have to decide if you want to breakup with boyfriend or take him back.

Long distance love affairs

You can almost bet when you’re trying to maintain a long distance relationship it is painful, extremely difficult and almost always ends in a boyfriend breakup; unless both of you are fully committed to making it work. If your not committed get prepared because the breakup is likely going to be just around the corner.

It is very likely you have seen more than one person experience this phenomenon. It really seems to be prevalent in the college age young people. Many of them had relationships in high school that carried forward into the early college years. However, when the schools were hours or miles apart and studies, social events and loneliness cuts in; the boyfriend break up can occur.

Lifestyle changes

What if your beau has become a real pain in the butt? It just might be the perfect time to change your life. Even though the boyfriend doesn’t want to break up you may have to be the one, who takes the bull by the horns, and does the breaking up.

boyfriend-breakupOftentimes as you mature and put on a few more years your thinking, goals and social approaches may change and often do. You may just be finding yourself not even wanting a permanent partner. And frankly there is nothing wrong with spreading your social wings.

Take the time to dig into your heart, mind and soul to see if the boyfriend breakup may be exactly what you need right now. Yes both you and your significant other may hurt when the breakup takes place, but both of you may be made of some very strong stuff and find out it’s the best thing that ever happened to you.

You can spend time trying to get your ex back.

If you are going to go down this route, you need to know the following things:

  • Don’t pester your ex – when your boyfriend break up with you, it meant that you have more limited access to him. So don’t text him multiple times a day or call him a lot.
  • It’s okay to flirt with other guys in his presence. It may even make him want you back more.
  • When you do get back together for a “trial date” be cheerful and friendly but don’t pressure him for more than he can handle.

But, if you have a feeling in your gut that the relationship is over when your boyfriend break up with you, then you need to start moving on.

woman-writing-letterOne of the first things you can do after your boyfriend break up is to sit down and write a long letter to him pouring out your heart. You can talk about the good times and bad. You can tell him what a jerk he is and call him all sorts of names. But, don’t mail the letter! Instead, take a candle out and burn it. This is one of the best ways to get closure after a boyfriend break up.

The next thing you need to do is do a property exchange. Give him back the t-shirt that you love to sleep in. Get the econ textbook you lent him. If there are things like toothbrushes that are too trivial to exchange, throw them away. Don’t have anything around that reminds you of him. If you have gifts that he gave you, box them up for the time being. If you have any money issues to resolve like debts to the other or a joint checking account, get them sorted out.

After you have completed the property exchange, agree that you won’t have any communication for 30 days. This may be hard if you are used to seeing each other on a daily basis, but after a boyfriend break up it is necessary to give yourself some space and distance.

ex-back-true-loveIt hurts a lot when a boyfriend break up with you. But it isn’t the end of your life. You can even look at it as a good thing because it means that you are now free to meet your true soul mate.

Of course, you shouldn’t jump to the conclusion that just because you’ve gone through a boyfriend break up that all of the doors are firmly shut. If you think you have a shot of winning him back and that’s something you want, you should by all means take the opportunity to do so.

True love can even survive a boyfriend break up.